Bob Saget Quotes

“I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them” ~ Bob Saget

“Today is the first day of the rest of your life. And if that doesn’t work out for you, Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.” ~ Bob Saget

“Kindness isn’t just a virtue, its a necessity.” ~ Bob Saget

“My father once told me, and it’s stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.” ~ Bob Saget

“Today is a brand new day. A day of change, of promise, of creativity, of kindness, and of love. I’m going back to bed.” ~ Bob Saget

“I’m a believer that when one door closes another one opens. But why does the one opening always hit me full-speed-knob-first into my nuts?” ~ Bob Saget

“Behind every great man in prison is another great man in prison.” ~ Bob Saget

“It’s so nice to share a day as beautiful as this one with hundreds of thousands of reckless drivers.” ~ Bob Saget

“Soon, I’m going to meet somebody around my own age, and she’s going to be smart and beautiful, and I’m going to date her daughter.” ~ Bob Saget

“I like to approach every day like it’s my first, so this morning when I woke up I covered my body with red gelatin.” ~ Bob Saget

“My girlfriend just told me I am one of the smartest people she knows. I told her, You need to meet other people.” ~ Bob Saget

Bob saget death Quotes

British comedian and and Great British Bake Off host Matt Lucas paid tribute to Saget as a “magnificently naughty comedian.”

“If someone sprays windex in your food it can give you diarrhea. But once you wipe it off your windows, you’re fine.” ~ Bob Saget

“A terribly sad day.” ~ Bob Saget

I am extremely saddened to just hear of the passing of my friend Bob Saget. You were always hilarious and kind. You made my life and so many other peoples lives better Bob. Rest In Peace.

“If someone sprays windex in your food it can give you diarrhea. But once you wipe it off your windows, you’re fine.” ~ Bob Saget

“My dad told me if I was ever intimidated by anyone, just picture them with their clothes off. He said that’s how he dealt with my mom.” ~ Bob Saget

“I wouldn’t hurt a flea. I’d finger a spider though.” ~ Bob Saget

“At the end of the day it’s the end of the day.” ~ Bob Saget

“Beautiful clear day in Beverly Hills. The sweet smell of Botox is in the air.” ~ Bob Saget

My dad’s like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?

Bob Saget Comedy Quotes

Now people want what the movie was about, which is violent comedy. And that’s really what The Aristocrats is based on – what will a family do out of desperation. ~ Bob Saget

What I’ve learned about comedy people is that they’re defined by the harshest level they’ve been to, their personal Auschwitz. ~ Bob Saget

I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy. ~ Bob Saget

The Comedy Store – all three rooms were filled with 800 people in the room. And during that time, all these guys and some women, but mostly guys who weren’t funny were doing stand up for a living; they weren’t accountants, they were making $30-$50 grand a year on the road, or more. ~ Bob Saget

Yet there are some people – Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he’s a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I’m doing it right now and you all seem bored. ~ Bob Saget

Latest Bob Saget Quotes

The favorite method of vice is to diss all responsibility be work or social, go off by myself, and enjoy a good steak and a great glass of wine. Oh yeah, and my kids are there too. ~ Bob Saget

I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again. ~ Bob Saget

My favorite procrastination is to make the choice to have valuable times with human beings that I care about instead of holing myself up alone to get my work done. ~ Bob Saget

In the creative sense, I’m looking forward to collaborating with people I have mutual respect for to create some really good work. ~ Bob Saget

Nothing worse than a piece of dried out fish.~ Bob Saget

I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.~ Bob Saget

I’m psyched about what I can contribute that can be meaningful to myself and to others.~ Bob Saget

All I’ve ever done is try to entertain my way through a life that often has a huge amount of heaviness in it.~ Bob Saget

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